Dumpster Decking: Argenport Sewers

Some people like digging through trash for little treasures: an old table that can be refinished, maybe a computer that can be fixed. Other people think that when a store throws out fruit or meat it is still good for a few more days. Then there are the people that like digging through trash cards in a CCG like Eternal. This is exactly what we do here at Dumpster Decking. Like a hobo looking for the last few puffs on a spent cigarette, we dredge the depths of the worst cards we can find and trick our friends and followers into building decks around them for our enjoyment. Are you ready to join us in this stinky mess?

Since this is our first Dumpster Decking article, we can set some ground rules for how this actually works after select the card:

  1. First and foremost these decks are, by design, supposed to be fun, not always competitive. we are not looking for meta breaking builds here (but if we find them, dammit, we will take them)
  2. Because it is for fun, it has to be spicy, it has to be subjectively creative.
  3. The card chosen has to be a staple in the deck. That is to say, the deck has to be built with the desired card in mind not just have the card tossed into a decent deck and hope it does not get drawn.
  4. Unless explicitly stated when the card is assigned, the deck must contain at least 3 copies of the selected card.
  5. The finished deck must have 20 games played and at or above 50% win ratio (we do allow the exclusion of power flood/screw games from this count)

So there you have it, DA RULES. Now, when SifuDanny came up with this brain child, Argenport Sewers had not been released, so he did not know what we would be getting into. Well, it exists, and Sifudanny put it out there and we have found a deck that is dumpster worthy. We will get into the deck, and its creator in a minute, but first lets look at the card itself. at 4 cost with 3 shadow influence requirement it is already steep, but the trash does not stop there. It is a non-weapon Relic so it is hard to dig for, impossible to pump, and outside of what text it may or may not have does not really pump other combos like spells or units can. The text says Summon: Nightfall so it does generate some more cards, but also does for your enemy. It has one more effect: When you start your turn at Night play two 1/1 Rats that can’t block. At the end of your turn (if you somehow found a way to kick ass with this trash) if you have three or more Rats, sacrifice Argenport Sewers. So not only is it hard to keep it relevant, but the card literally punishes you for trying to use it effectively. At least the art is kind of cool…

4 Combust (Set1 #392)

2 Dark Return (Set1 #250)

4 Grenadin Drone (Set1 #5)

4 Torch (Set1 #8)

4 Dark Wisp (Set1 #264)

4 Devour (Set1 #261)

2 Vara’s Favor (Set0 #35)

4 Assembly Line (Set1 #29)

4 Bloodrite Kalis (Set1 #397)

4 Madness (Set1 #267)

3 Torrent of Spiders (Set1 #272)

3 Argenport Sewers (Set1003 #14)

4 Bait (Set1001 #2)

4 Dizo, Cabal Chairman (Set3 #302)

3 Fire Sigil (Set1 #1)

4 Granite Waystone (Set3 #1)

4 Shadow Sigil (Set1 #249)

4 Amethyst Waystone (Set3 #201)

4 Crest of Chaos (Set3 #268)

2 Seat of Chaos (Set0 #60)

4 Stonescar Banner (Set1 #419)

There were 7 entries from the viewers of SifuDanny’s stream and denizens of his discord, The Dojo. But, there can only be one… winner seems like the wrong word considering the context, but winner is what they are. RAXIE did everything in their power to make this card do something, credit where credit is due, because the result is almost passable. You can follow along with the whole deck in SifuDanny’s Video. The first thing to note is that this deck, even by its creators admission, is just better without Sewers. While all of the other submissions tried to keep nightfall up to generate rats, Raxie went another direction. The deck uses Sewers as a 4 cost, 2 token generator and couples it with other cards like Grenadin DroneAssembly Line, and to an extent Torrent of Spiders. Using tried and true methods of other Sacrifice decks, this hunk of junk deck tries to generate card advantage and ultimately wins out with Bloodrite Kalis, or a bunch of little nips to the face. The deck stumbles around, but it works about as well as can be asked of it and its little stumpy rat legs.

The only things missing in the eyes of SifuDanny are cards like Quarry or Smuggler’s Stash, but there just was not any more room so it is understandable. Ultimately the deck met all of the criteria, and when it works there is a real sense of accomplishment and dare I say it, pride. At the end of the day, through all of the submissions and even some testing with Team Rankstar members Argenport Sewers just proved to be as terrible as we all thought it was. But hey, our specialty is soft takes and weak plays so what do we know? Do you have some janky, masterminded, meta crushing deck that harnesses the untapped power of Argenport Sewers? Drop us a line and make us write a retraction and record a new video about how great this card actually is.

-The_Mantid_Man and SifuDanny

 

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